World of Bonecraft

Hollywood is out of ideas.  They have been for quite some time.  Let’s face it, they couldn’t find an original idea if it was growing out of their casting couch.  Every year, fewer people were going to the theaters.  During the latest “recession”,  Hollywood took a serious hit in the fat wallet.  Having resolved that there was no way they would wipe their asses with anything less than hundred dollar bills, economy be damned, execs started looking for a way to make a buck.  They tried remakes, revamps, but eventually found two things that seemed to make money for them – 3D tech, and comic books.  Any title that had some kind of following was up for grabs.  Batman and Spider-Man proved that comics could make money, and 3D boomed after the mega success of Avatar.

Of course, making a movie in 3D didn’t mean it would be a guaranteed hit.  Also, comic books had its share of stinkers – for every “The Dark Knight”, there’s a “Jonah Hex”.

I don’t care how hot she’s supposed to be.  She still couldn’t make me give a shit about that movie.

Even Hollywood’s trailer park cousin, Cousin Porn, had its share of financial problems.  The failing economy had hurt their industry (all that waxing and implanting costs money you know), and they found themselves being forced to innovate as well. Only in the case of Porn, you get creative by putting some kind of PLOT in the movies.  Of course, since nobody in porn had any idea what a script was actually used for (other than deflecting wild money shots on set), they turned to their coked-up relative for advice.   Like Hollywood, Skin City started pulling ideas from established mainstream commodities, called them “parodies” to avoid a lawsuit, and gave them a skintastic reworking.  Nothing was out of bounds – from TV shows like Dog the Bounty Hunter and The Big Bang Theory (giggidy) to movies likes Star Trek and Batman.  Hell, even the billion dollar blockbuster Avatar was given “the treatment.”

And by “treatment” I mean anal.

Video game developers have been forced to get creative as well.  Some IP’s were fortunate enough to have a strong market presence in other media, and they just rolled that popularity over into the MMO marketplace.  But there’s only so many genres that a game can fit into, which makes it hard to stand out in the crowd.  Studios discovered that it was going to take more than claiming to be the next big thing to gain any kind of attention or following.

The D-Dub Software studio decided that they were going to follow in the footsteps of greatness in order to stand out.  Much like Hollywood, they weren’t planning to do anything original like reinvent the wheel.

Much like Cousin Porn, they just took an existing wheel and slapped a pair of big boobs on it.

The result?  Bonecraft

Congratulations World of Warcraft.  You have your own porn parody.

About Donny Rokk

Gamer. Writer. Lover. Fighter. Defying stereotypes, one nerdgasm at a time.

Posted on January 25, 2011, in Blog. Bookmark the permalink. Comments Off on World of Bonecraft.

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